How hard is it being a teenager?

Adolescence

(NOUN)

Adolescence is a transitional stage of physical and psychological development that generally occurs during the period from puberty to adulthood. Adolescence is usually associated with the teenage years, but its physical, psychological, or cultural expressions may begin earlier and end later.

First things first, this is a requested one by a dear friend so shoutout to her. 

I believe this is the first blog where I'll be able to express my feelings openly without any barriers or second thoughts since I am a part of it. In this society, there are two sections: people who think adolescence is very easy and all unicorns and glory; and another section who thinks this period is genuinely hard to go through. I might agree with the latter; it can be exhausting sometimes. I'm surrounded by people who support me and give me honest opinions and reviews but I've met people and am friends with some who don't have that kind of privilege. From strict parents to nagging relatives to ignorant friends, they've got it hard. 

This blog might need a whole breakdown to cover, I'll do it in parts and it'll mostly reflect on the hardships faced.

1) Getting your first period- Getting your first period is genuinely a big thing, it brings a kind of maturity where you understand how to deal with stuff now. Although when I was informed this is gonna happen every month, I knew I had a big thing coming. I understand it biologically and why it's important but it still sucks to sit every month with a hand over your stomach and crying tears of Satan. 

Now getting to the irritating part, even though periods are not as stereotypical anymore, I've seen people still making fun of women. Hell, I've seen it in my own school when my classmate got her period for the first time in school. I'm sorry, but if I'm pretty sure you have a mother or a sister who has to go through the same thing, then why make fun? We've all heard how periods are taken care of in villages. They think of it as some kind of sin we commit, I'm pretty sure this ISN'T something in my hands. 

I've heard middle schoolboys say, "Periods can't be worse than a breakup." Definitely untrue, breakups only involve feelings, this is a whole cycle running in the body which is actually painful involving hormones, emotions, feelings and so much more.

2) Experiencing your first relationship- Relationships and Breakups sound something like a sin when you're 12 or 13 but you start understanding the real deal when you turn 16-17.  There are experiences like petty breakups over unbearing personalities and there are serious breakups over cheating etc. Even though most people date and break up despite the taboos, there are families where dating and breakups are considered a crime and the house members ground you or something (mostly in Indian households).

3) Expecting perfection and being a perfectionist- To clear things up, there is a huge difference between expecting perfection and perfectionism/being a perfectionist. Expecting perfection is from someone else's perspective when they conjecture you to be the best at everything, ranging from physical attitude, household chores, studies, and anything else possible while being a perfectionist is when you crave to be perfect in every aspect yourself and going anything below it makes you panicky and anxious. 

There are times when perfectionism proves to be unfortunate, it develops habits of anxiety and panic attacks among teens and you tend to feel depressed and worthless when you produce unsatisfactory results. 

Similarly, when people expect perfection from someone else, it develops a feeling of guilt and dejection when they realize you keep disappointing everyone around them. In today's world, you experience this scenario mostly in a parent-child relationship. I've heard realistic incidences where parents expect so much from their children to the point where they become su!c!dal and tend to think low about themselves constantly. From being perfect at chores like cooking to always scoring the best among your peers, the list is never-ending.

4) Having an oppressive family and relatives- This is something not everyone experiences but it's still a very common notion among adolescents. Parents often tend to blame their young ones for any negative situation or any wrongs happening. They seldom take out their personal frustration related to work and other matters on their kids which indirectly affects them mentally and emotionally. It's like, the reason for a household falling apart is always the children. Constantly fuming over them or being frustrated with them as well as stamping them as "dumb" or "slow" makes them feel backward and that like they aren't good enough. 

5) Choosing a stable career and handling studies- I've always felt that the Indian education system is a huge scam for multiple reasons. At the mere age of 16, where our minds are still developing and we're still learning more about this world, we're expected to choose a "stream" which will probably dictate the next 40 or something years of our life. I agree that it makes us independent and we have a free choice of either shifting or changing our line of interest but often this decision proves to be unsuccessful and truthfully from a teen's point of view, the idea is pretty fearful since no one can predict the future. 

At this particular phase of life, the work and study pressure increases to the extent where it's hard to differenciate your social life from your private life which is kinda scary. It's definitely important to learn how to balance this pressure and live with it whilst also take out time for your own leisure and spend it with your friends and family. 

There are a lot of moments experienced by this category of people around the world but these are what I think the basic and the most "relatable" ones I could think of. At the end of the day, we're still developing, we're still learning about the positives and the hardships, we'd probably mess up a lot of things, we'll make stupid decisions in life, but in the end, the most important thing is to understand that not everything we'll do is going to turn out well and we need to learn how to face the good and the bad instead of cribbing over it and wasting precious moments. (that is the most motivation i've ever given and will probably give.) I've already covered most things about friendships in another blog so I wouldn't repeat all that again.

The last time I published a blog was on January 16 and I feel so light to have written something after ages. Boards suck and they took all my time but now I'm free for sometime lol so I'll definitely write a few pieces beforehand to publish. Anyway, have a good day/night and don't forget to stay hydrated, it's extremely sunny <3

I'm attaching a few links if anyone wants to donate to the victims of the Uvalde elementary school shooting in Texas:

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**Images I've used in this blog are NOT mine. These have been taken from pinterest and I have no claim on them whatsoever. But, the content that has been written is mine. NO PLAGARISM IS ACCEPTED AT ALL. If I see my blog being published somewhere else without my watermark or permission, I won't hesitate reporting you. Please be considerate, thank you.**

-Ilaria :) ©️